New Career Direction??

Ok so I've been thinking about what i could have as a career. This might be a bit odd but I've really been thinking about something with the Church. I dont know what exactly because i dont think i would be able to stand up in front of a crowd and preach. But its really hit me that whenever i'm doin something with the church it makes me incredibly happy. That feeling hasnt faded and i could always have photography as a hobbie, something that i could possible make some money from that. I wouldnt know how to tell my mom that i want to because i dont think she would ever really understand how amazing it is to have a relationship with God. Although i dont think i would be ready to go to CPC just yet. I would want to have more knowledge of the bible and a closer relationship with God. But thats all i can blab out for now anyways. Let me know if u have any ideas for what i can do at the church.

I'm Not Sure

So i am being to think that i should stay and now i feel that i should find the courage to tell my dad that. I have heard many peoples opinion and in most ways i want to. Although tonight my mom has made me realize that if i did i wouldnt want to stay with her. It would be way too hard on my relationship with God if i did. I will probably stay with her until i find a job so that i can live out on my own or with someone i trust. But talkin to her tonight made me feel how i did before i moved out with my sister. Resricted, not 18. Not able to put what i feel is important to me first. Why should i feel that i am 16 having a cerfew and problem with going out with the people i care about?? It's not fare and she doesnt even understand how i want to just get away for a couple days. I believe that i could talk to her til i was blue in the face about how i wanted to be treated and it wouldnt make a difference. My hope in her seeing that goin to church and youth makes me happy is fading very quickly. She bases her outlook on me going to lawson because of what other people have told her. I am going to try to get her to come to lawson maybe this weekend if not next weekend. I dont feel right living in a place where i dont have support with my belief. Lost and tired of the same arguement with my mother....

Another Cry For Help

Ok so i've really had a crappy week. Most of who will read this will know exactly why. But another road block has come up. I finally got the courage to phone my dad in calgary and my mom. i phoned my dad and i think i might have made the mistake of agreeing to move to Calgary for a while. I'm kind of regreting it because now i want to tell him that i'm not goin to move there. But in some way i do want to move there. Jobs r starting at $10 and $15 an hour, which would be very helpful towards a car. But what i'm wondering is if that car would really be worth it??I've just began to make friends that mean an incredible deal to me. There's also the problem if i stay and get a job here then i wouldn't be able to spend christmas with my dad. I usualy spend a couple weeks with him every second year. I've tried talking to God but i cant get a clear answer. I feel he wants me to go on the next m:180 trip and i want to as well but that would mean i would be dissappointin my Dad, he wants me there asap. I feel too much pressure to go and i dont know if i should take that as a sign that i shouldnt go or that i should push myself to go. I know no one can tell me what i should do but I'm really just lookin for a sign on what i should do!